How to tie a bow tie (or: welcome to adulthood, learn a new knot)

OK. Bow ties are back in (sort of), I get it. But what is with the clip-ons? Why is it that we draw the line of learning fashion knots with the Double Windsor? Learning new things can be fun and - with the internet - so easy!

I don't want to hear "I don't know how to tie a bow tie" as an excuse to not wear proper adult attire. If you didn't know how to tie a standard neck tie, would you just give up and shop in the children's department for a clip-on? No, you would learn the old fashioned way, from your dad, girlfriend or some other source of such wisdom. As such, clip-ons are relegated to kids, who have yet to be educated on the proper technique of tying a safe knot around their own necks.

So why is the bow tie any different? It's just a blinking knot. If you couldn't learn a simple knot, you'd still be in Velcro sneakers - so you are capable of doing this. I have faith in you.

As always, if Google knows how to tie a bow tie, you know how to tie a bow tie. Problem solved.

I can hear it now: "but - I don't have a self-tying bow tie." Well you didn't have a clip-on before you bought it either, so smarten up and start shopping where people assume you have half a brain. I'm a fan of etsy for these sorts of things, as I could care less about brand names, don't like the sideways glances of sales people as a woman who shops in the "mens" department and also have a serious soft-spot for handcrafted accoutrement. I have bought several bow ties from xoelle - and would recommend that shop highly, as they used recycled fabrics (old ties, shirts etc.) and can even take your old neck ties and turn them into bow ties. I've recycled two old silk ties that were a little worse for wear and now they look fabulous - as will I, every time that I wear them. 

So there you have it - all you need to know to enter the world of the adult consumer of ties. Maybe later we'll talk ascots, as I'm starting to see those pop up in the queer community. That means it's only a matter of time to see them popping up in hipster bars and straight clubs.

n.b. Don't ever be caught in public by a very talented photographer wearing a clip-on tie if you are going to be commenting on the dubious nature of said item. Unless, of course, this is some kind of ridiculous child-like costume for a flamboyant parade - then, at least, you would have some kind of lame excuse for this mildly public contradiction.

Open doors for little paws.

This week was cold. I say that as a Canadian born in Northern Ontario and raised in Montreal. I've seen some cold days and weeks - and this past week was no exception. So on a late night walk home a few days ago, when I noticed, through the slit of space between the rim of my parka's hood and the top of my scarf, two kittens in a snow bank, my heart sunk. This kind of weather must be really hard on the animals that call the streets "home". It's been estimated that Montreal has about 1.6 million stray cats - and here were a few of the newest, most vulnerable cohort.

By the next night, they were in my bathroom, huddled in a corner - entirely due to the persistence of my partner, who, with great patience and daring had scooped them up just before the temperature dropped yet again. Her hands are a little worse for wear, but we both feel better knowing they are off the street and out of the cold. We are working to get them habituated to human contact - which is clearly a bit of a novelty, just like the regular meals they greedily lap up from our hands. We won't be keeping them, but will give them over to someone willing to but the time and resources necessary to get them comfortable as house cats.    

They are pretty sweet kitties and have already come a long way. If you know a responsible someone looking for a furry friend, please drop me a line.

UPDATE: the kittens have a new home thanks to the power of the internet! Thanks interaction between Twitter and Blogger - you're awesome! And to the lovely couple who took in these two fuzz-balls, well, you're awesome too!

Desautels Business Conference on Sustainability

I'll be speaking again at this year's Desautels Business Conference on Sustainability. This year's theme is "REdefine, REdesign, REbusiness". The conference is using the recent economic crisis and the ongoing ecological crises to revisit the concept of doing business, doing well and doing good. 

On Friday, January 21st I will deliver a presentation on "Creativity, Diversity and Transformation" where I will work with students to recognize some assumptions that many of us carry about - about change, the status quo and changing the status quo. I hope to communicate how important it is for us to harness the power of the wildly creative energies that surround us to make our business more human, while at the same time making them  more innovative.

The full conference will be held January 20-22 at McGill University in Montreal, Quebec - you can get more details on the full program at the website.

Rachel Maddow - David Bahati "Kill The Gays" Bill Sponsor

Never take your rights for granted. In times of tumult there are always scapegoats. In the 21st century we will likely face a series economic, environmental and population crises. Any delusional belief that a certain kind of person, by their nature alone, is causing harm to the "foundation" of a culture (e.g. the family) cannot be tolerated. Something is not a fact because you assert that it is, yet we allow people to make these assertions based on their personal beliefs in ancient religions. When these sorts of campaigns are brought to the political realm, they serve as distractions to the root of real problems in society - none of which have anything to do with who your neighbor sleeps with. 

The rights of personal beliefs cannot supersede human rights - as it stands this most frequently means the rights of women, gays and minorities. Below you can watch the madness in this kind of assertion, as Rachel Maddow interviews Ugandan member of Parliament David Bahati. He came to the US to promote a bill that would punish homosexuality with life imprisonment or execution. You better believe there are numerous North Americans who feel the same way as this man - it's easy enough to find them, but I won't privilege them with a link here.

Fun with Google labs: Dogs more popular than cats

With all the power of the Google Labs Books Ngram Viewer we've finally been able to answer the age old question; which are more popular - dogs or cats? As it relates to references to the beasts in English books from 1800-2000 - dogs come out way ahead. Sorry cat people. 

Fuck you Fluevog! (a love letter)

Dear John,

I've had it. What the hell is it with your product? What the hell is it with your "oh-so-clever" marketing - targeted at freaks, geeks, nerds and dweebs? I mean, who would create an entire (immaculate) line of shoes named after bloody public-radio? Public radio? Really? Come on. No one listens to public radio these days. No one.

These are called BBCs. Apparently the BBC is some kinds of "news institution."

Who the hell to you think you are that you can just confiscate my hard-earned cash and force me, at virtual gunpoint, to apply it to something as impractical as a sixth pair of (Fluevog) shoes? In all earnestness - I'm an environmentalist - I don't need six pairs of (Fluevog) shoes. I didn't even need five pairs of (Fluevog) shoes. And because I'm a highly rational being, I'm blaming you, John, for your seemingly perfect understanding of your clients - me, obviously, being one of them. Now could you stop it? I'm running out of closet space.

As a rather petite woman with somewhat masculine sensibilities, shopping for anything - let alone footwear - can be tiresome. I cope, trust me - but only because I like a challenge and am as persistent as a mosquito at a Winnipeg garden party. However, unisex wear is rare and mostly not very fashionable - there is an unusual notion that the world between male and female is beige rolling sea of Pat-like sensible and sexless attire. You understand this as a ridiculous concept, John, recognizing instead that this very particular aesthetic space should just as easily be reserved for the fabulous -decidedly more Bowie than Pat. For that, I will hate you (until your next public radio shoe comes out. And then I will love you and throw hundreds of dollars at you. I know, it's confusing. Love can be that way).

It gets worse. As a pretty committed vegan who occasionally buys leather products if they are a) likely to last for a long time due to proper craftsmanship and a consideration to repair and/or b) from sustainable sources, e.g. used, waste or scrap leather - I would prefer to not have to have leather products. As a person who undertook veganism from an environmental standpoint, vegan shoes - often not very durable and/or made of petroleum products - are not always a more sustainable option, though they are, in theory, less cruel to produce. Of course, John, you make this simple - not only do you offer finely crafted leather shoes in fashionable, classic styles, which can be worn for years - but now you have a number of vegan and eco options.

Honestly. Just stop it. I can rationalize these kinds of purchases like it's nobody's business - shopping is almost a charitable act at this point. Damn you! What about consumerism, John? You are making it almost impossible to be anti-consumerist! There is no reason not to support your sweet blinking Canadian business. How do you sleep at night?

These dandy shoes fit men, women and VEGANS. WTF? (get out of my brain, John!)

I teach university students about positioning - and how many companies will sacrifice their position for growth, only to find that by straddling multiple markets they end up servicing the needs of no one particularly well and then resort to competing on price. This is a difficult concept for many business people to grasp. It's so tempting to think you can do it all - but you rarely can. We all want to feel special after all, so maintaining some kind of focus is key to a sustained competitive advantage. Clients become loyal to those that really want to service their particular needs and not doing so leaves room for someone else to jump right in and do just that.

Naturally, John, you are a master of positioning. For 40 years, you've successfully targeted a chronically under-serviced market of well-to-do oddballs at the expense of people who would rather not take the chance of looking a touch unusual. Oh yippy-skippy! Further, you seems to be deepening this relationship at every turn - suggesting a stellar understanding of your market. I assume this is because you are one of us, but I can't say that for sure, it's just a hunch. It's also because you want to hog our quantity-of-quality seeking dink dollars all to yourself, you inconsiderate jerk.

So congrats on getting to 40, as much as part of me hates you, I love to support Canadian businesses that are making responsible choices. May you have many years of continued success.

PS. Nice move on the sweet limited addition tie - another weakness of mine (naturally).  If only I hadn't blown far too much money on fistfuls of beautiful recycled bow ties last week.... but I'm sure you'll have no trouble unloading those little gems.

Chevron Thinks We're Stupid: the step-by-step guide.

A colleague of mine sent me a great collection of links pertaining to a recent Chevron greenwashing campaign, and it is with great pleasure that I repost them here.



It's really worth visiting the Chevron YouTube Channel to view the comments associated with this video, which include the following most popular comments, as voted by viewers of the above video: "In California, Chevron spent $4.1 million lobbying legislators to change regulations so it can refine a dirtier grade of oil at its facility in Richmond without conducting any environmental review on what the change would mean for the low-income community surrounding it." and "In Washington, Chevron spends millions each year lobbying Congress to make sure we don't get a cap-and-trade bill, or anything else that might harm their profit margins.In the Arctic, it wants to drill for oil even though knowing such operations would be risky and hard to clean up.It's also one of the chief sources of funding for disinformation about the causes of global warming."

As is becoming more and more prevalent, there has been a response to this ad, this time found at Funny or Die, and apparently credited to the Yes Men (there is more information on the campaign on their website).

 

Chevron Thinks We're Stupid from The Yes Men

And to drive the point home, sketch comedy style:

Anatomy of a Greenwash from Paul Scheer